In India’s Jalgaon district, Maharashtra, 383 men died by suicide in the first six months of this year. According to data from Maharashtra Police, an inability to find a bride was cited as a factor in 29 of these deaths.
The suicide data was collected from Jan. 1 to June 30. It also cited various other causes, including drug addiction, depression, family problems and debt.
But after the marriage-related factor emerged in the 29 cases, discussion has begun in Jalgaon over the issue. Questions have also been raised: were these suicides really driven only by an inability to find a bride, or is there a more complex social and economic reality behind them?
Visiting villages across Jalgaon and speaking with young men, their families, women and experts who study the issue reveals a complicated picture. Marriage there is no longer just a personal decision. Jobs, land ownership, caste, family responsibilities, migration, women’s changing expectations and social pressure on men — all of these combined have made marriage an increasingly complex matter.
‘Marriage should happen at the right age’
In Jalgaon, we spoke with Bishal Patil, about 30, a professor by profession. His views on marriage reflect the thinking and experience of many young men in Jalgaon.
Bishal Patil said his parents also want him to marry, but he is delaying it somewhat because he wants to focus on his career now and become financially self-sufficient.
He said he wants to marry only after finding a woman who understands him and is suited to him.
According to Bishal Patil, Indian society has a fixed idea of the right age for marriage — generally between 24 and 26, or at most 28-29.
In his words, once someone crosses 30, society’s attitude starts to change. It is not just that the person hasn’t married; a perception can gradually form that something is lacking in that person.
Mukesh, a mental health counselor, explained that when marriage becomes tied to social status and success, many unmarried young men begin to see their unmarried status as a personal failure.
This is an important consideration when analyzing Jalgaon police’s recent suicide statistics.
According to police records, marriage was cited as a factor in 29 suicide cases. But police themselves do not believe that failing to marry was the sole cause in these cases.
Factors such as drug addiction, depression, family pressure and debt can also play a significant role in these cases.
More unmarried men than women
Maharashtra’s statistics point to another important reality.
According to the National Family Health Survey-5 (NFHS-5) for 2019-2021, about 11% of women aged 20 to 49 in Maharashtra are unmarried. For men, the figure is 30%.
In other words, the number of unmarried men in Maharashtra in that age range significantly exceeds the number of unmarried women.
But there are questions over whether the smaller number of women is the only reason for this.
The case of Jalgaon’s Kaustubh Potdar brings a serious dimension of the issue to light.
After earning a B.Pharm degree, Kaustubh worked at a private company in Nashik. After his mother’s death, his family began searching for a bride for him. But because he did not have his own house or a government job, he was repeatedly rejected by prospective brides’ families.
Kaustubh Potdar died by suicide in February 2026.
His case does not mean every marriage-proposal rejection stems from the same cause. But it shows that a man’s financial stability and family structure have become important factors in marriage.
‘Only once I build a pucca house will I find a bride’
An elderly woman in Jalgaon said her son is now 40 years old. She has been searching for a bride for him for many years. But after being repeatedly rejected by prospective brides’ families, she is now building a pucca (permanent, brick-built) house herself.
Her hope is that once the house is built, a bride will be found for her son.
Her concern over her son’s unmarried status was clear. But even more evident than her words was her sense of helplessness, since years of effort had failed to change the situation.
Mayur Kudupale and Joel Cabalion, who have researched rural Maharashtra, found the same shift reflected in their research.
According to their research, factors such as land, education, caste and the groom’s age influence women’s marriage preferences in villages.
Mayur Kudupale said that in the past, a bride’s family looked most closely at how much land the groom owned. Now, whether the groom has a job matters more than land.
He said the rural economy has changed, but people’s expectations around marriage have not changed equally in step.
In the past, land was seen as a symbol of social and economic stability. Now, that has been replaced by a regular income, employment, the possibility of living in a city and owning one’s own home.
Marriage expectations are shifting
Even amid these changes, caste remains a major barrier.
According to Mayur Kudupale, factors like caste and tribe limit the range of people’s choices in marriage. When searching for a match, many families still confine themselves to their own caste and tribe.
Gender-equality trainer Darshana Pawar highlighted another dimension of this structure.
She said that if a man feels the need to marry, he may agree to marry a woman of a different caste. But whether that woman’s caste will be accepted by his parents and relatives remains a big question.
In other words, caste-based barriers to marriage have not fully disappeared — only their form has changed.
Women’s expectations around marriage
While speaking with men in Jalgaon, one complaint was heard often. Many men claim that women’s expectations around marriage have risen.
They believe women now want a life partner who has a job, owns a house in the city and is financially stable.
But speaking with women reveals a somewhat different picture.
An interview was conducted with a young woman aged 20-22 about marriage and personal expectations. But the day after the interview, her family said the conversation could not be used in the report.
This makes one thing clear: even as women’s expectations change, not everyone has the freedom to speak openly about it.
Darshana Pawar said wanting to talk with one’s husband or wanting to spend time together outside the home is not a misplaced expectation. Nor is it an excessive demand. Rather, it is a basic and reasonable desire. Awareness of this is now growing.
Most of those interviewed in Jalgaon blamed only women for the failure of marriages to take place.
Mayur Kudupale’s research also found similar complaints about shifting preferences among rural women and men regarding marriage.
However, the research did not view the shift in women’s preferences as simply a matter of rising expectations. Behind it lie multiple factors, including declining agricultural work, unemployment, changing attitudes toward education, and caste and social status.
Where do men stand?
While discussing marriage in various villages of Jalgaon district, men’s manner of speaking was also seen to shift. Some were unwilling to speak on camera.
One young man said directly: if he spoke about himself on camera, who would marry him?
Many families have now stopped pressuring their sons to marry, having largely given up hope after years of unsuccessful effort.
Still, some families continue trying. Some are building houses, some are buying land. Others are trying to improve their son’s financial position to make it easier to find a bride.
Many families now rely on matchmakers. But some parents allege that fraud in the name of arranging marriages has also increased.
In search of a life partner, some men are traveling to different parts of Maharashtra. Not only that, some families are even willing to pay money to secure a bride.
As a result, the search for a match has now gone beyond the traditional circle of relatives. Involved in this now are middlemen, financial transactions and searching for brides in distant districts.
From female feticide to a changing marriage market
Darshana Pawar raised an important point on this issue.
She said the impact of the widespread female feticide of past decades is now becoming apparent among the generation of men of marriageable age.
Men aged 30 to 35 who still haven’t found a life partner were born at a time when a large number of female fetuses were being aborted.
But a smaller number of women does not mean women now have the final say in marriage decisions.
Mayur Kudupale and Joel Cabalion’s research also states that while women’s decision-making power has increased somewhat, factors such as family expectations, caste and social structure still place pressure on them.
Meanwhile, men too are trying to find their place amid jobs, income, caste, family expectations and shifting ideas about marriage.
Taken together, the picture in Jalgaon shows that the marriage crisis cannot be understood simply as “brides can’t be found.” Tied up in it are population imbalance, economic stability, jobs, land, caste, family expectations and the shifting attitudes of women and men.
Bishal Patil, however, sees the matter differently. In his words, “Marriage isn’t everything in life.”
On mental health
Anyone facing mental stress, depression or other mental health issues should seek help from a specialist.
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues or showing signs of them, please reach out to a government helpline. It is also important to talk to relatives and friends.